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Another sexual assault discussion

I took this from my facebook, where HTML is impossible, so capital letters are the only form of emphasis available. I might format this later.

This contains heavy sarcasm. Heavy. YUGE.

It's absolutely amazing watching guys flood a discussion about rape to scream INNOCENT TILL PROVEN GUILTY while falsely accusing all women of lying, but to really be gobsmacked, you have to observe the smug arrogance of men who proclaim that they don't need to READ BOOKS ABOUT RAPE.

And then they demand evidence from women. Which they ignore or then just dismiss out of hand. This is often called JAQing off----just asking questions.

Oh, and butthurt Trumpies are a new feature, too. Yeah....no. You voted for an asshole who BRAGGED about sexually assaulting women. You have no place in ANY discussion.

And another feature of these discussions is the way the guys ABSOLUTELY refuse to listen to women.

Is THAT why they're so obsessed with defending the concept of lying women? Why many of these guys jeer at "enthusiastic" consent? (You know they do.)Because the way they try and shout women down makes you wonder what they're actually defending. I suspect it's themselves. I suspect they're remembering all those instances where they tuned out a woman or where they just steam rolled over her. After all, who LISTENS to women, amirite? So if they say something stupid like "No", it's their own damned fault nobody listens, right? Right?

Which brings us to the last point. These guys scream about the poor sensitive falsely-accused Oscar winner while they brand women liars without the bat of a hypocritical eye, but what REALLY gets them incensed is any woman who behaves like a man----like me, for example, if you define "like a man" as "refusing to tolerate aroogance, lies, or condescension, states one's opinion without qualifications or equivocations,demands answers, and gets exasperated with bullshit." Men who do all these things are called assertive. This is what women get called.

Notice the claims made here:
1. I never claimed to be first.
2. My unit most definitely did and STILL exists now.
3. Somebody says? Oh, wow, I'm totally convinced.
4. More anonymous sources, saying....what??

They won't listen to me so fuck 'em. They search for offense and find it. Unless you kiss their ass you're a man hater and they'll happily make excuses for how "feminazi" is totally fair but using your own judgment (by a woman) is persecution. CRUCIFICTION. A witch hunt. They NEVER use those terms for women. There is NO such thing as "Innocent till proven guilty" when you are a woman being accused by a man.

Yet women are to accept being bashed and condescended to by these guys. Sexism is unique among all hatreds because the defense is, "Yeah, so? She IS a bitch." Your choices are bitch or submission.

They expect you to take them by the hand and educate them while they either ignore it or ooh and aaah over them. Anything less than adoration is abuse by default. You only have two speeds where they're concerned.

And their excuse for not reading books? "It's about the rule of law and the presumption of innocence." Yeah, that's nice. Funny how it removes all sexism---theirs----from debate. And yet they ALWAYS falsely accuse women.

Oh, and ladies? NOTHING exists unless this guy sees it or experiences it. Nothing. Just stop. And YOUR experiences are probably lies but his are tremendously witty, interesting, LONG, and RELEVANT.

The final thing these guys do is magnification. Okay, FINE. Go ahead, make your jokes. But why are rape apologists so whiny? Any resistance or disagreement by women is being a harpy or a feminazi or a man hater. It's crucifixtion. Persecution. A witch hunt.

The phrase "woman-hater", though, gets shrugged off, because what ELSE do you do with women? They are SO hatable after all.

And God help you if you're sarcastic or just fed up with the bullshit. You're asking for it. (Men never ask for it. They're ALWAYS innocent.)Then you are "crucifying" them. You are conducting "a witch hunt." Bitching about a legal decision about a guy is "declaring one's self judge, jury, and executioner." Yeah, well, if I could smite assholes via a key on my computer then why are they still here? These guys get so overwrought at disagreement from women that you can get a glimpse of how cushy their lives are compared to womens'. You also wonder how they greet the concept of "no" from women.

"Women who disagree" so incenses these guys that they start raging both about crucifixtion and oppression----their own. Geena Davis did research about how men freak out when there's more than one woman per five men in a movie, but is there any way to measure the milijoules of male fury at women who refuse to suck up, who refuse to play nice, who think their history and their opinions---especially if they actually ARE informed about the subject----are more important than the bloviating of guys who assert their right to NOT read? Unread guys think their opinions are more important than the informed, educated, opinions of women. And they are flat out enraged at the notion that those bitches think otherwise. Male rage at female opinions fueled gamergate and the MRAs who morphed into Trump's Nazi base. (They care only ABOUT white men. When brown men get accused of rape, these guys are eager to "protect" white women who they would scream at as liars were the accused white men.)

And THEN there's the women. There's always the Reichwing women who think that strong means being an attacker rather than victim, though without a bat of a contradictory eyelash, they might talk about how they were victimized. Remember "The Only Moral Abortion is MY Abortion", that essay about the same demographic of women who see themselves as the extra special, unique, pure, innocent, perfect exception to the rule that all OTHER women are stupid lying filthy slatternly whores? So THEIR abortion is totally necessary? Yeah, keep that in mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah, people keep saying "internalized misogyny" but the evil stepsisters of the Reich sure aren't shy about attacking other women. You know the "compliment" 'you're not like other girls'? These are the "girls" who think that that compliment is all the better because if they throw other women under the bus, the sleaze at the wheel won't get to run them over while struggling over THAT hump.

And then there's the girls who are either lucky or oblivious enough to have somehow avoided sexism their whole life. They get terribly upset at sarcasm so they invariably tut tut.....women. Not men. They will wade into the fray and start simpering at the sexist guys, all the while waving their finger at women who have actually been fighting this fight since before this little fetus was able to walk upright. It's one of the most passive aggressive things you can imagine. Sometimes they confide they've had an experience, too, and because they Learned and Healed and Grew, you should too. Thanks, fetus, but take that sparkly shiny fairy shit and turn it into a glittery suppository. People are REALLY afraid of women getting angry. Why? Because they know what they've done and they fear finally getting nailed? Because payback's a bitch? Because every bigot, every sexist, every racist, knows that their paranoid hatred of women, POC, and LGBTQ folks amounts to an inadvertant confession?

Like....BLM. (Hatred of BLM is SO reliable as an asshole indicator I'm reluctant to mention it.) Who in FUCK could have a problem with the idea that Black Lives Matter TOO? The "too" is implied but it's there. So much of this culture illustrates that to many people, black lives do NOT matter, and this movement is to reddress that imbalance.

And that is threatening when the whole message is, "Please don't kill us."

The whole rape (and sexual harassment, and sexual assault) discussion amounts to women saying, "Please don't rape us. Please don't call us liars."

And the male response is, "Lol you bitches."

Well, after a few rounds (or decades) of that, women have reached the point where it's become, "Fuck you then. We TRIED asking nicely."

Last but not least are the BWATM people, the ones who attack you for not mentioning male victims. We're talking about female victims here.

Furthermore, the correct sentence is, "Men get raped." It's declarative. "Men get raped, too, yannow!" is a demand that the minority of victims get the majority of the attention. The people who do this display NO interest in discussing it in any other context but when women are fighting men to get them to stop shitting out the usual rape apology turds. They do not have discussions about this topic on its own. The two types of victims are treated so differently that they cannot be part of the same discussion.

You disagree? Look at Milo. For YEARS, he has been harassing and stalking and attacking women, and encouraging others with his, "Will no one rid me of this troublesome priest?" coy claims that he's not responsible. He's repeatedly attacked female rape victims.(And of course Trump is president because people either don't give a shit that the guy bragged about all manner of sexual assault or harassment, or they actually live vicariously through his behavior.)

But the minute Milo talked about boys he was dead in the water. Girls? Nobody gives a shit. To be sure, part of this is homophobia, but I'm sorry....a 48-yr-old guy and a 13-yr-old boy IS abusive. The end. I'm not going to sit here and kowtow to the sensibilities of those who demand women excuse themselves and apologize and qualify their every opinion. I've addressed this topic before. But in a week, Milo was over. Trump is president. And when 13-yr-old girls DO accuse men or boys of rape.....they get called liars. Boys get called some fucked up shit, but "liar" is not the go to.

And by the way, what IS with these plantation owner type fantasies? Certain guys always seem to think---and some actually whine out loud---- that all they want is to be asked *nicely* and they'll distribute some rights. But those aren't rights if someone else holds them and decides who gets them.

These rape discussions have been going on for decades at this point. Women aren't giving up. Rapist apologists think they can just be assholes, but fuck them.

From now on, I just conclude that these guys defending sexual assaulters and harassers and rapists are rapists themselves or want to keep theiroptions open. They only have their own words to blame.



This is my dad. He can't have been more than five or six, against the backdrop of the Russian tray I brought back from Moscow.




A variety of things have been happening lately. And then there's the election of a lying orange fascist to the White House, a guy who lies pathetically, obviously, and often right after something he said that was entirely different. His obsession with the size of his inauguration is positively Freudian. Freud must be spinning like Nancy Kerrigan at the thought of all the summer houses and little midlife crisis cars he could buy off of Cheetolini's grandiosity and pitiful boasts.

How do you sum that up? He's been married three times and has five kids. Tell me a woman could get away with that. He just had to pay $25 million in the lawsuit off of Fraud U, a suit he said he'd never settle. He insulted Muslims, Mexicans, women, Gold Star families, little girls, the disabled.....Actually, stop right there. After that little performance he gave, mocking the disabled reporter like an overgrown orange schoolyard bully from The Little Rascals, that should have been it.

I just don't get how anybody could watch this flaming sphincter lie about any- and every- thing and either think, "That's great!" or watch him lie and think, "Who cares?"

The guy has driven a casino into the ground---and make money off it through complicated tax shenanigans. He refused to reveal his taxes. He lied so many times about Putin it's easier to point out when he told the truth. Which....must have happened, right? Somewhere?

He's been sued thousands of times for aggreeing to pay workers for services, then backing out on the deal.....because he could. He's even been sued by law firms who worked on those suits, because no one is safe from Cheetohitler's greed.

He's bribed two Attorneys General. He's filled his cabinet with billionaires and crooked slimebags who are supposed to destroy the very agencies they've been appointed to lead----all at the behest of a bloated red-faced day drinker Nazi named Steve Bannon, who you can thank for that venomous snake Milo. Funny how Milo attacked and libeled and harassed dozens of women over the years, but nobody gave a shit. Same thing with Trump and other white men. If you attack women, even little girls, well, that's okay because what else are they good for? Okay, Trump and Woody Allen and Polanski may have liked them a little young, goes the Reichwing thinking, but we have both houses and the White House, who cares about the pretense?

I sure hope the Bernie or Bust purists and the Sarandons feel happy. I notice they still haven't stopped telling lies about Hillary, though, so let me just say this: Shut the fuck up, you whining assholes.

Would Hillary have banned all Muslims?

Would Hillary have appointed all those billionaires to the cabinet?

Would Hillary have dissolved protection for trans rights? Smirked and used Nazi propaganda? I could go on, but if you seriously think "Yes" is the answer there you're a bigger asshole than Trump, and that's saying something, because you should be smart enough to face your issues and not project them on a world you just took part in ruining.

LIke I said, the bullshit here is too deep to wade through. I've been sick since the end of January and I frankly haven't had the energy. Fuck these Nazis AND their whiny little fanbrats, too----and oh, by the way, the angry little fuckers just HATE being called Nazis, even while they use Nazi propaganda and ban entire religions and dismantle the rights of everybody who's not a rich white racist dude.

They hate women----yes, even some of the women. No, I don't give a shit Milo is gay. He hates being gay. Nor do I care he fucks black dudes. He might as well be masturbating when he does so, because he's just fetisizing is unfortunate partners. Aside from which, his whole shtrick is, "Some of my best friends are....." except he's offering his services as that "black friend." He hates women. He hates black women. I wonder who he DOESN'T hate, because bile is all he's got, apparently. Even Breitbart booted him.

I'm sick of morons who say, "But I didn't think he MEANT it," and then whine about their Obamacare. The orange obscenity has spent HIS LIFE cheating people, screwing people, bragging about himself, getting sued, lying some more, and starring on shitty TV shows. And, apparently, assaulting women, although he seemed to want a cookie when he said he wouldn't assault a 12-year-old Paris Hilton.

And how stupid is he? "My inauguration was the biggest ever."

"You realize there are photographs, right?"

"Those are fake."

Yeah. Fake. Anything he doesn't like is fake. To that end he has waged war on the actual media, even while he bitches about the leaks.....but not the substance of them.

I can guarantee you one thing. From the moment his shoes touched the carpet of an Aeroflot plane to take him to Moscow, he was bugged. The golden showers tape was just the FSB's version of letting him know they were waving the most innocuous thing they had on him in public, threatening him with what's worse. My money's on a tape with an extremly young and small prostitute or something even worse---and he either can't perform or he does and it's violent and possibly fatal.

Putin does not mess around. He poisons first, sometimes non fatally, then he sometimes uses poison to kill. He likes public executions, though. And he'll kill his own to get what he wants. His excuse for the second Chechan war was the apartment bombings in the late Nineties that he blamed on....Chechans.

If he won't hesitate to kill his own to get what he wants, what won't he do to people who are nothing to him?

Putin, like Trump, is massively insecure. If you think he's bad as as a puppet master, well, consider him as an enemy. God help us if there's a personal falling out between these two incredibly insecure, vain, boastful, slimy men. They'll do anything to stifle the feeling that the image they think they present is not the image others see. Yeah, you're welcome for those nightmares. I didn't vote for this asshole.

The mango monster is so unforigivably stupid it boggles belief. One can only assume his followers are even more dumb, if that's possible. No, wait, I guess it is. "Oh, he didn't mean that!" The US Intel community so distrusts him that they're holding back intelligence because they're afraid it'll go straight to Putin.

And the hypocrisy! "EMAILS! BENGHAZI!" Well now you have an orange anus who decided on the Yemen raid over dinner with Bannon ----a peacetime Navy seamen who never saw action and Agent Orange's son-in-law, who also serves as a human shield for Cheetolini by playing the part of the "Jewish friend" to stem off attacks on the Nazi-like tenor of Bannon's Breitbart.

Dinner. Yeah, that meal that Trump also uses to discuss North Korea over, in full view of the unvetted public at his club, to which he charges access.

One SEAL died in that raid. Several others were seriously wounded, and God knows how many unarmed civilians---including children----died on the ground.

CheetoHitler tried to claim Obama approved the raid, but he did not. The risk wasn't worth the gain. So there you have a grown man of seventy, trying to tattle on another man.

I could go on and on and on. I won't.

Make no mistake. We need to fight for our country. We need to protest and hold their feet to the fire, and if they disconnect the phones, we'll show up at their houses. And if this cranky old soldier with agoraphobia, a nasty cough, and a bad knee can do it....you better, too.

The spectacle with the immigrants made me see red. Can we trade gamergators and these nasty little edgelords for those immigrants, those translators to whom we made promises, the doctors and students, and tourists and green card holders.....All of whom come here because they believe the myth.

The GOP needs to be called on their bullshit. They claim to be patriots, but they hate the Consitution and never read it? They claim to be brave fighters of terrorists, but they live in fear and terror. They claim to be Christians, but they cast out the "foreigner traveller in your midst" and do anything they can for money, they take shelter from the homeless, medication and doctors from the sick, while they hate their neighbor and proclaim their 'faith' from the street corners. Jesus would have a horsewhip with their name on it, I think. In fact, the minute I see "Supporter the cops, Blue Lives Matter, Remember 9/11, Christian, Patriot, Milo, that Watson dude from Infowars, Breitbart, Sean Hannity," I know I'm dealing with one of these American nazis who inexplicably ALSO love Putin.

And while Agent Orange can't control who endorses him, he also can't deny that WHEN NAZIS AND THE KKK LIKE YOU IT MEANS YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG.

Christ, this cheeto on two legs attacked John Lewis---YES, that John Lewis----faster and more viciously than he ever used on one of his KKK followers.

I'm not even going to mention the Frederick Douglass thing because that was so stupid I'm afraid it might cause a rip in the fabric of reality. "I am Moron, the destroyer of worlds."

This has to be our level of engagement now. There are people who we have not backed up till now. Now we start.

It won't be fast and it won't be easy, but this is what we have to do. This is what it means to be a responsible civilian. Get up and get protesting.
How much overlap is there between the assholes saying "Kim K lied" and the "I just KNOW Hillary is lying," people, plus the "Amber Heard is lying" crew, along with the "Amanda Knox HAS to be guilty of SOMETHING!" crowd?

All these women have a LOT of evidence that they are being falsely accused, that they are telling the truth. Heard had video, photos, witnesses, sworn statements, and medical records, but all that proof just made people accuse her of being conniving. Knox, of course, was falsely accused by the Donald Trump of Italian law enforcement, a guy who hands out false accusations like they're party favors. Her room mate was the victim of a rape and murder by a local sleaze who liked to threaten people with knives. Prosecutors and cops took an instant dislike to the young, pretty Knox, and subjected her to abusive interrogation. Why? Why does the GOP hate women? Probably the same thing.

When the DNA came back, though, it pointed exclusively to Rudy Guede. The cops then offered HIM deals if he would just implicate Knox.

Strangely enough, people call Knox "racist" for accusing her boss, but that's not what happened, and even if it was, she was under duress at the time.

But NOBODY cares that Rudy Guede REPEATEDLY falsely accused Knox. NOBODY calls him a misogynist. Lying about women....well, that's just boys will be boys, innit?

Hillary, of course, has been falsely accused of all kinds of bullshit for decades, always by the sort of loser who has to denigrate anybody BUT white men. Themselves, in other words. It's just about impossible at this point to tell the liars on the left from the liars about Hillary on the right, because they tell the same lies. Hello, Berniebros, if you repeat the same rightwing shit that's been debunked for years, you are sexist. It's a lie and at this point your determination to demonize a woman proves you're sexist.

All those people who say "ignore the trolls" and "oh, it's free speech" (but they only EVER defend MENS' free speech and how they attack women with it) have inadvertantly created this. Proof used to matter. Now the neo-Nazis and the anti-social little edgelords are all over. "Ignoring them" (would you just shut UP about it already?) , it turns out, meant in reality, letting them rampage around without anybody stopping them, and now the GOP has turned into Gamergate, except with fifty- and sixty- year old losers on their third or fourth wife instead of incels in their mama's basement.

Jacob. Tamir.

Patti Wetterling: "Until last week, Jacob was alive to us."

Jesus Christ.

Jacob begged to go home at the end.

Yeah, I know, I know, "the childruns" is such a cliché.....but I don't know *anybody* who can't remember being scared as a kid.....and how Mom made it all better.

I don't even have kids. I never wanted them. Never bought the clichés, the romanticizing, none of that. I wouldn't have been a good mom. I am, however, a very good (or bad) evil auntie.

But even I get struck by how very vulnerable children are. And how trusting they are.

Jacob was taken from his mom. She never got the chance to comfort him. He died in terror, knowing he was going to die.

Civilian *adults* shouldn't have to experience that. But *kids*?? Jacob was a kid who got taken at a time when people were just starting to take account of what adults did to kids. Some kids. Nobody says it out loud. In a town of 3,000 people, Jacob should have been safe. Other kids? Well. Um. There are whole segments of this country where children don't have that freedom from fear.

That just hits you so viscerally, with this kid.

But why not Tamir Rice? He was Jacob's age.

Jacob was taken away and killed. Tamir was murdered where he stood. One was sexually molested by his killer. One was not. One was murdered by the boogeyman. How do you live when your is everybody else's hero?

If we can't keep ALL our kids safe.....from US....who *are* we?


I'm watching the election crap with astonishment. For starters, there's Trump. The guy has six bankruptcies, three marriages, over three thousand lawsuits against him, a history of sexually harassing and denigrating women, a habit of refusing to pay workers, has bribed at least one AG, AND he won't release his taxes. He courts the New Klux Klan on the Block, his campaign managers have been a woman-abusing rage monkey, a Russian crook, and now a white supremacist with a history of racism, beating women, and every kind of hatred there is.

And then there are the people who claim there's no difference bewteen him and Hillary.

They call her a warmonger, blame her----and ONLY her----for wars, deaths, Presidential orders, rapes, her husband, and.....global warming.

Let's see, what is this called? For starters, it's false equivalence and it's lazy thinking. You just don't want to do the heavy lifting. Hillary Clinton is an extraordinary candidate who's being subjected to a smear campaign that's extraordinary. Trump is a Nazi. You're saying she's a Nazi. To me that says you are at best, lazy, or at worst, have designated Hillary as the repository for all your misogyny. (And it WILL spill over on other women, it's the nature of hatred.)

Trump accuses her of racism---Trump, who refused to rent to black people, Trump, who called for the execution of the Central Park Five.

Then there's Sanders. For thirty years, Sanders has accused women of voting for female candidates because they both have uteruses.

Then there's his refusal to reveal hos taxes-----while demanding Hillary reveal every last little thing. Worse yet was his attacks on her for "superpredator." She was not an alected official. She could not vote for tge bill. Bernie did.

Don't get me started on either Stein or Johnson. They want to be public servants, they say. Yet between elections, neither of these gadflies do anything for the public. They only show up when the cameras start flashing----once every four years. They have no history of service. They have no experience. Stein dogwhistles to anti-vaxx nutjobs. Threatening to vote for them out of spite indicates that you're eager to bash Clinton even though everything people use as an excuse is nothing but Repub propaganda.

The Boston Globe printed a story the other day that typifies the biased coverage.

It was about how, in 2009, the Clinton Foundation (which, as a charity, receives higher ratings than the Red Cross) requested diplomatic passports for a couple of staffers so that they could accompany Bill Clinton. This request was turned down. (Much like other stories of "favors for donations", the accusation is made, but it's never pointed out that that these requests were turned down.)

The Globe's source, Judicial Watch, claimed that Secretary Clinton took an undue interest in these events.

The article does not that that particular incident is when two hostages were veing held by North Korea. It does not point out that as Secretary of State, Hillary would have been remiss in not being interested in an international incident that required the intervention of a former President.

Judicial Watch is a group funded by the Scaife Foundation. I'll wait while you look that up.

Meanwhile, Trump's threats, lies, frauds, and everything else gets brushed off. Every accusation against Hillary is taken as fact. Don't kid yourself that this election involves just one man and one woman. Men have been accusing Hillary (and all other women) of horrible things, and other men (and some women) are eager to believe in those accusations. Meanwhile, when Hillary tells the truth (and she does so almost always) she gets called a liar.

Remember that the next thing some guy interrupts a conversation to whine that women.


starcat books, pumpkins, and oh my!

Here's a struggling little bookstore, trying to keep going. http://starcatbooks.com/2016/08/10/buy-from-us-online/

They sell ebooks and with a little, ahem, tweaking and pulling and stuff, you can read them on anything, and I do mean anything. I have a kindle, for example. Besides, who doesn't love the idea of sticking it to Amazon now and then? It's a legitimate sale, plus it works for all of you out there who hate Amazon or whomever.

As for updates, well, my house got broken into and my bike got stolen right out from under my nose. The guy's been casing the neighborhood for houses that belong to women, asking all kinds of creepy questions, "Are you alone? Do you live alone? Is the man of the house here?" (How did he know that a "Man of the house" would be more merciful than I would be? Huh.) I almost caught the fucker: I ran after him in bare feet for six blocks, and then I realized, "Ooops, bare feet." My feet got all torn up on newly-spread gravel and asphalt, which I didn't even feel when I was running after him. My knee was the size of a basketball. Not pretty.

A few years ago, the theft would have sent me down into the abyss again, because I was just barely climbing to the lip of the exit. Now I'm furious, wondering how I'm going to get a new bike----I'm not supposed to be running, but damn that felt GOOD,----and worried that I will not get the chance at dismembering the thieving little fucker the way he so richly deserves.

I think it has come time to sharpen one of my machetes on the front step.

Oh, AND:


The cop who was helping me yesterday rejoiced at what she called her "last foot chase." The guy had a gun. She was a forty something female, didn't look to be in *that* great shape----I mean, Simon Biles-----but she chased a *much* younger guy down in 80+ degree weather, kitted out in body armor and a polyester uniform, and took his gun away from him without using hers. We chatted. I relayed to her the eerie experience I had just weeks back from Iraq, at the old house, seeing a kid holding a nine mil in the alley, waving it around.

"This country's gone crazy, " she said grimly. I figured I knew where she was heading, and I braced myself for something pro-Trump.

"Everybody's gun crazy," she said. "There's too many guns. Everybody has a gun. It's nuts."


It's that time of year. The morning glories have started blooming.

Unfortunately, I have been doing a lot related to the knee---stitches come out tomorrow!----which has made sitting down at a desk hard, but hopefully with continued improvement, that will change.

This election has left me stunned with horror. Why didn't people see this coming, our children will be asked. If they survive. Why didn't you do something?

Why didn't we, indeed.

I never thought I would live to see a Gold Star father savaged in the press. That day has come.

Later, I'm going to sit down. See you then.

Jul. 26th, 2016

Leg is very swollen. Don't look. Ugh. Have been on phone with idiots at Home Depot, who have decided that no, the phone number I have used for years is NOT acceptible, instead they are going to call a friend in another state to let her know that the non-repair guy is on the way.

I spent forty five minutes on the phones with these twits this morning, and then.....tjey called her again. In Texas. Because she got me a fucking present five years ago. Read more...Collapse )

It is hot, the pain killers make me dizzy, and Home Depot is trying to weasel out of not honoring their warranty because their machine damaged my house.


So I was in the hospital, having surgery. When I'm less drugged, I'll write more. Holy shit, they dumped FIVE different new meds on me, four of which seem to be fairly setious pain killers. Funny thing is, it dodn't rrally start hurting till a few hours ago, after I got home. (I'm typing this in my phone with a fuzzy cat Who Shall Remain Nameless shedding all over, so I'm blaming my typing on...them. Plural pronoun, do you can't identify the culprit. Hah!)

I managed to change the sheets on the daybed before toppling over. The upstairs of the house is COOLER than the downstairs, or was, before I hoisted open some windows. (I'm not allowed upstairs for a few days because I have THREE incisions and THREE sets of stitches. Apparently letting my stumble around for SEVEN months on what the VA called a "badly-torn" meniscus is NOT a great idea.

I have to keep an eye on the windows because Fred hates squirrels the way I hate Cheetohitler, and I'm pretty sure the feeling would be even worse if he was tiny amd stole my strawberries, in addition to being a of a person.

So. I should be writing more. I'm goung to be laid up for a while, so it's that or God knows what.

The Stanford rapist has a friend

Honorable Judge Aaron Persky,

It was with great sadness that I read the news about Brock Turner, and the horrible situation that he was involved in. It came as a huge shock to me.

Brock has been a peer of mine since elementary school, and was a very close friend of mine for a few years in high school. He dated one of my very good friends, [name removed], around the same time. In those years, he was always very respectful of everyone. Teachers, classmates, friends, and girls, all alike. He is one of those people that no one has a problem with, and is pretty much good at everything. We all knew he’s swim in the olympics one day. His family is a very respectable family in town. I also know his older sister, Caroline. They all seem like such good kids brought up by two very cool and grounded parents. In all honestly, if I ha to choose one kid I graduated with to be in the position Brock is, it would have never been him. I could name off 5 others that I wouldn’t be surprised about. Brock is such a sweetheart and a very smart kid. I never once caught him harassing anyone, verbally of physically. That would have been out of his character.

It’s pretty frustrating to see the light that people are putting him in now. It used to be “swim star” and now it’s like he is the face of rape on campuses. It’s such a false way to put it. I cannot believe it. I’ve thought a lot about it, and from different angles. I tried to accept that maybe he did intend to harm this girl, but I just couldn’t imagine that was the case. I know rape is a very sensitive subject, for everyone, and especially women. I am not backing it up or making excuses, but there is absolutely no way Brock went out that night with rape on his mind. I think he went to a party and was drinking, like almost every student at a university does, and was flirting with this girl, like he said. The woman recalls how much alcohol she drank, which was a lot. She was no doubt about to black out if not already. I’m sure she and Brock has been flirting at this party and decided to leave together. Just as they did she passes out, which after that many drinks, anyone would. At the same time, Brock, having a few too many drinks himself, is not completely in control of his emotions. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that alcohol increases emotions and feelings. I think this is all a huge misunderstanding. I think that the bikers who found him did the right thing by keeping him there in case he was attempting rape, but that after the investigation, it should have found Brock to be innocent.

Brock is not a monster. He is the furthest thing from anything like that, and I have known him much longer than the people involved in his case. I don’t think it’s fair to base the fate of the next ten+ years of his life on the decision of a girl who doesn’t remember anything but the amount she drank to press charges against him. I am not blaming her directly for this, because that isn’t right. But where do we draw the line and stop worrying about being politically correct every second of the day and see that rape on campuses isn’t always because people are rapists. It is because these universities market themselves as the biggest party schools in the country. They encourage drinking. I think it is disgusting and I am so sick of hearing that these young men are monsters when really, you are throwing barely 20-somethings into these camp-like university environments, supporting partying, and then your mind is blown when things get out of hand. This is completely different from a woman getting kidnapped and raped as she is walking to her car in a parking lot. That is a rapist. These are not rapists. These are idiot boys and girls having too much to drink and not being aware of their surroundings and having clouded judgment. I’m not saying that is every case because I know there are young men that take advantage of young women and vice versa, but I know for a fact that Brock is not one of those people. He is respectful and caring, talented, and smart enough to know better.

Attached is a photo of Brock I took in high school. He has always had that huge, loving smile on his face. The caption is even “d’awwww” because he was always the sweetest to everyone.

I appreciate you taking your time to hear about my past with Brock and my opinion on the matter, and I hope you consider what I’ve said when looking into the sentencing. I would not be writing this letter if I had any doubt in my mind that he is innocent.

Thank you again,

Leslie Rasmussen
It's that time of year, you know the one, where I start sadistically
taunting people with berries.

A short play, based on current events

Woman: A man did something terrible to me
Society: you lying whore.
The man: I totally didn't.
Society: oh, you poor dear, that lying whore is being mean to you.
Woman: here's proof, (because a woman accusing a man of anything means she's a liar) in the form of witnesses, photos, video, plane tickets, etc., etc.,
Society: Wow, you faked ALL THAT STUFF? Also, obviously, you must be a devious scheming bisexual, because bisexuals exist only in porn movies, as bunny boiler villains in shitty misogynistic thrillers and as fodder for the threesome fantasies of straight men.

The End

There's a LOT of women attacking Amber Heard on the basis that Depp never allegedly abused Paradis, who was not half his age and had her own millions. Never mind that on June 11th, 1994, OJ Simpson had never murdered one of his wives, either. And don't talk to me about how the cops "didn't see anything" when they were called to the Depp condo. Bruises take time to form. Batterers, morover, are skilled at NOT leaving marks. Also, given that cops abuse their families at far higher rates than the general public, the chances are good that Heard had an almost fifty/fifty likelyhood of summoning another abusive man to her house when she called the cops. Nobody ever mentions that. Do you think a wife-beater is going to sympathize with an abused woman?

People are calling Heard a gold digger for asking for spousal support. Apparently they don't know that in California, you have to ask for that in the beginning or lose all chance of getting it, ever. Any good bargainer would tell you you always start out higher. Given the number of white guys defending Depp whose movies I hope get bootlegged out of existance---Paul Bettany, who it seems os dimb as a post; Tery Gilliam, who turned out to be a straight up misogynist, and some asshole named Stanhope, who doesn't deserve female companionship EVER again---Heard's career is essentially over.

Being accused, credibly, of raping ANYBODY in Holywood? "Oh, you poor oppressed white man, here's some Oscars."

Accusing a white guy in Hollywood of rape (or anything) "You lying whore."

Of course, OJ isn't white, but he worked really well for white guys on Hollywood who needed that "black friend." Cops came on police calls and left with autographs whole Nicole documented her injuries-----and OJ learned what he could get away with. Where's this arch liberalism I keep hearing about? When it comes to women, Hollywood turns Republican. Kind of funny, too, how many supposedly traumatized white men act out their trauma not by, ypu know, attacking anybody---- in situations where they're at a disadvantage like say, with a big huge cop right there----but only in convenient locations where the numbers and tge situation are all to their advantage.

And I don't CARE what the mom of Polanski's victim allegedly did. For one thing, if it comes from Polanski apologists, fuck right off. Secondly, he's an adult. If he can't manage his dick, he needs to lock it up till he can. Ahem.

People call young women like Heard gold diggers. Older guys like Depp don't get labeled. He pursued a much younger woman. He knew what he wanted. He got it, too. Why am I supposed to feel sorry for this guy, who's one step removed from the predators who buy desperate Eastern European women, secure in the beloef that they can get away with anything? He wanted a young girl. He bought her. He doesn't get any sympathy from me.

Heard reportedly had cold feet about the marriage. It turns out if you look at old pjotographs, you can see her with old injuries, the sort of thing you get when you're scratching at somebody to try and free yourself.

Abusive guys often resort to breaking things or.....trashing hotel rooms, as a threat to the victim. Often they threaten pets. Often, they carry out those pets. Heard asked for a TRO for one of her dogs.

The narrative that Heard's a gold digger subtly suggests that it's okay for poor old Depp to beat her up. People are attempting to use her sexuality to the same end. That whole "love, honor" thing? Yeah, I'm pretty sure bi folks can read. Straight guys are projecting again.

One of the more infuriating defenses of Depp, in its utter brain dead ignorance, was by Paul Bettany, who claimed Depp was always nice to him. Well, of course he was, you moron. Guys like Depp don't even beat up ALL the women they're romatically involved with. Some of them, though? Guys like Depp believe in alibis. A few women, but most of all, other white guys. Women might get the charm at first. Some women. There's no more effective alibi that one of those "You're not like other women" Cool Girls. Depp seems like the type to cultivate LOTS of those.

Abusive guys are NOT out of control. The really crafty ones never abuse in public, before witnesses, leave marks, or behave the same with everybody. Other guys are human beings; women are just private punching bags, pieces of uppity furniture. How dare that table take offense at being used like a table, goes these guys' thinking. The *woman* is the one not doing *her* job, so it's okay, even necessary, to punish her. Welcome to the twelfth century.
Hey, look what I found in my garage! I wondered where that went. I'll just spread it out on the bed, it'll be.....

Five seconds later.


How many little green strawberries do you see?

I dug out my French shopping basket to take rhubarb to the VA. It's a big basket, at least two feet long. It was full, too. When I brought it back home, though, it had been picked clean.

The strawberry plants are laden with little green strawberries now. They can't be picked till they're ripe, alas, but that makes waiting for them like Xmas.

I promised my cousin P some strawberries for his help this winter. There'll be buckets of raspberries, too, and I haven't even built my raised beds. I did start some seeds on the porch....and I planted tons of morning glories.

Stop me before I start talking about shovels.
He just looks so happy.

I put my first sprig of lilac from the bush I planted in my window.....and
now the aroma of lilacs just fills the room. Oh. My. Gawd.

Fred does not approve of.....you.

I really, really, REALLY want to find a teeny Egyptian pharaoh headdress
to put on Fred.

May. 17th, 2016

Look at this chunky monkey.

If you refer to Hillary Clinton as a warmonger, a bitch, a Republican, or evil, YOU are the problem, not her. She is nome of those things. She is a female politician who has been subjected to thirty years of vile attacks by Republicans. No, she will not be indicted. And if you justify some of this by claiming she was a Republican "in the Sixties", you need to take a good long look in the mirror. Clinton was thirteen in 1960.

All of these attacks testify to the fact that Clinton is being subjected to a far harsher standard than is Sanders. Remind me again when MSNBC convened a panel of women to criticize Sanders' cankles, his clothes, his hair----and his wife. Sanders knows this or should. If he does not, he is not fit to be President. If he does and uses it----thereby encouraging his vicious little followers----then he is not fit to be President.

In Nevada, the Bernie fans didn't trouble to learn the rules, didn't show up prepared, and when informed that the rules applied to them, they shouted "Bitch!" at Barbara Boxer. Then they demanded the rules be changed to benefit them. This is apparently what justice looks like. I have some arrogant little puppy on facebook right now, boysplaining to me that his sexism is totally new and exciting "not-sexism", because that would be inconveniant for him. Another smug asshole keeps threatening women with a Trump administration because we won't vote for their idol. "Look what you made me do" is abusive in any setting, and that's all that #Bernieorbust is. Extortion is what a lot of fake male feminists do to women when they want to be given all the attention of all feminists, everywhere. You know what a real male feminist does? He doesn't look for excuses to become a Republican, and he doesn't threaten to give up because we weren't his cheerleaders. Yeah, we don't need men carping at us, thanks. Go talk to men. Go talk to men who think that a man calling a woman a bitch backed by thousands of years of murder and rape isn't sexist because a feminazi once wouldn't let him pay for dinner (though he made it clear she better put out) or wpuldn't let him hold the door for her. (That woman also gets abortions at eight months, three weeks, and six days, when she's not ripping doors out of mens' hands. Call her Mary Celeste, the Flying Dutchwoman of ghostbitchez, eternally roaming the land, searching for doors to slam and dinners to scam.)

You know how you can tell a Hillary voter from a Bernie fan? I'll vote for him. His fans will not bote for her. The fact that they have to build her up as evil says it all. If she's evil, Machiavellian, devious, cynical, greedy, a corporate shill, a warmonger, then Bernie isn't just this mediocre old white radical who's like every guy ever who promises to do chores around the house and never does, and his fans aren't spoiled little white boys. No, if Hillary is evil, Bernie's mantrummy fans become victims and Bernie becomes a brave crusader.

But if Hillary is just a competant and (badly-attacked by Repubs and people who *need* to hate her)politician and woman whose opinions evolved over the years, then Bernie's brats aren't victims any more than Bernie himself isn't another career pol with little to show for it. It comes down to a practical woman who just won't bake cookies, who knows exactly what people are saying about her, and who knows how to compromise, because that's how adults work, versus a guy who might have good ideas....but ideas don't protect womens' rights and dreams don't let transgender folks use the fucking bathroom of their choice.

There are pure people in the world who would never deign to go to war, to do this or that. Funny thing is, wars happen anyway. You can wish for peace, love, and happiness....or you can fight when you must, and stop it when and where you can. That's realism.
I got out my old reel mower and mowed some of my back "yard." I assess yards in terms of how many 4x8 raised beds I can put up, so at the back of my house, there's space for at least two more beds end to end and maybe one beside on the right, and two side by side to the left. I didn't actually much want to mow the lawn. I did it anyway. That would have been impossible five years ago.

Then I transplanted some lillies of the valley, dug out my mower-sharpening kit, and threw in a couple of loads of laundry. Yesterday I mopped the kitchen floor and part of the dining room. Cleaning is therapy, especially when you consider VA therapy. Every time I get my hands in the dirt, I feel better.

Might not be good news tomorrow. I think that toe is infected again.



So there's this.

I'm trying to get my surgery set up. I was racking up six, seven thousand steps a day without even trying. You'd be amazed how many steps it takes to sweep and mop just one room.

The big news is.....I got on a bus. By myself.

There's a wonderful hardware store near here. The manager is a woman and they have a store dog. (ALWAYS patronize stores with store pets. ALWAYS.)

After some test runs with a VA staffer, I developed some panic attack mechanisms. The buses are new; they're fueled by a combination of eco-friendly fuels. They're built differently. They don't rattle. Plus I realized that one ride that I thought took at least twenty minutes.....took only two minutes. That's another coping trick.

With panic attacks, I sometimes can fake myself out by just doing something without planning or preliminary. Plus cold weather helps.

So.......it helps if there's a reward at the end, and that reward was this hardware stores. I LOVE hardware stores. Crack, man. Pure crack.


I looked at saws, tools, bird feeders.....all kinds of great things. But I had to take a cab home because I got wiped out. The cab driver tried to get me to reduce the tip, but I like to give big tips, because....just because. Also? He made me laugh when we got into a discussion about the differences between IUDs and IEDs.


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